Thursday, January 31, 2013

Sometimes kids can teach us adults

There's one thing in life we can all depend on, and that's that trials will certainly come our way. How we choose to react or deal with these trials is always our own choice.  I know many friends who have more trials than is humanly possible to imagine.  I wonder why Heavenly Father has given them or allowed them to go through so many trials, but I see that they are very strong people and they teach me many life lessons as I help them. 
This past week I had a relatively mild trial and I feel like I certainly could have passed the test better than I did.  I know that this is an area of my life that needs to be constantly worked on.  I'm generally a positive person, and I have a natural easy going personality so I don't usually take things personally or get upset at things that aren't important in the eternities.  I definitely am not a worrier, to the point that it bothers my husband that I don't worry enough.
Well this past week something happened, nothing major in the scheme of life, but just something that was a trial for me.  Here's how it all unfolded....
A few weeks ago I was asked by the leader of my band Gravel Road if I could get some of the kids I teach and also our girls band, The Foggy Mtn Girls, together to perform with Gravel Road for a benefit concert up in Lewiston.  Everyone who knows me, knows just how much I love to play bluegrass and so I was very excited after this Fall's dry spell to finally get to play a show again.  I was really excited that the kids I teach and who I've pulled into their own band were going to get to play it too. We've named their band The Bluegrasshoppers and they were all very excited that they were going to get to play it too, and especially because they were going to get to play the show all by themselves and without me playing with them. 
All was going well and I had spent extra time working with the kids over the last two weeks.  For an entire week four of these kids were staying out here next door to us with their grand parents and I had gone over every night for four evenings and worked with those kids.  Then I worked with the two guitar players who are brothers and finally on Monday a few days before we were to do the show on Saturday, I went to town and worked with all the kids to have them ready for their show.  We practiced working the mic, how to introduce their band, where they should stand in regards to the mic stand and then how to feed in and who would be taking breaks on each song.  The kids sounded so good and we had worked so hard. 
Then on Wednesday came the phone call.  The two guitar playing boys' mom was on the phone.  Both boys had come down with the flu even though they had been given the flu shot this season.  I was devastated, and I just knew that my prayers were going to be answered and the boys were going to be all better by Saturday, so I didn't allow myself to worry about it, but I know that my disappointment was very apparent to their mom, and this is where I felt like I failed the trial.  I was so busy practicing with both Gravel Road and The Foggy Mtn Girls over the next few days, but in my mind I was just positive that the boys were going to be all better and able to play come Saturday. 
When Friday came and their mom who was now getting sick with it too told me that as of that day if they weren't a lot better by the following day they wouldn't be playing, I know now that my voice must have given away my feelings.  The following day I phoned their house and spoke to the oldest boy who's eleven years old.  He informed me with his sad voice that they weren't going to be able to be there and once again I'm sure he detected my disappointment, because an hour later their dad called me to explain that they felt like the boys were still contagious and that they didn't want to spread this bug to the other people at the show.  The poor dad I'm sure had to build up courage to call me.  I could tell by his voice that it was very hard for him to make that call, and I knew that I certainly could have handled this trial better.  I felt so sad and guilty for how I had obviously been less sensitive to the poor kids and their trial, and realized how selfish I was to have even let them feel any of my disappointment.  The Holy Ghost whispered to me in my heart that if I was this disappointed imagine how the poor boys must have felt. 
I've learned a valuable lesson, about me being selfish in my wants for the kids to the point that it made those poor kids feel even worse than they should have had to feel.  I always hope that I'll do better next time when such trials come my way but the truth is that I don't seem to remember these lessons until after the fact.  I want to do better and I hope to someday learn these valuable lessons.  I guess I just have such a passion for bluegrass music and I have had so many great blessings in my life through my music so I want everyone else to feel this in their lives too, but I need to step back and make sure that my exuberance doesn't cause me to make choices that are counter productive to ultimate goal with my teaching.
I ended up playing guitar with the kids and yes it was a disappointment to the rest of the kids in their little band, but no it wasn't the end of the world.  Life will go on and there will be other times for them to get to play together. 
The Bluegrasshoppers
Trials are inevitable but how we deal with them is up to us.  We can learn lessons and grow through them or we can fail them it's our choice.  I hope that the next time I have a trial, I'll pass the test a little bit better.